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Gabrielle Smith

Selectively Slutty has moved to Patreon!

Published over 1 year ago • 1 min read

Hey guys!

Amidst a lot of life changes (once more!), I'm returning back to dedicating a lot of time to content creation. In the pursuit of that, Selectively Slutty is moving to Patreon! And you can still subscribe for free.​

(Or, you know, you can become a Patron for as low as $5/mo. There, you'll have access to my close friends list, weekly video/writing and Patron Q&As!)

I'll be sharing free content monthly, with some occasional bonus material (videos, writing and maybe even a worksheet!). Here's how to follow for free:

Here's a preview of the newest newsletter!

The Power of Non-Monogamous Community

The best thing I’ve done in life was make friends. Because of them, I’ve been able to live a life with so many colors. I’ve been able to love out loud, cry my heart out, and find support in the darkest of moments. My closest friendships have been born out of solidarity and the mutual desire for sustainable, connected community. We walk toward the path of solidifying our position as chosen family. As someone who was emotionally neglected as a child, and still is rather estranged from most of her family, my friends are what keeps me alive.
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To write these words and truly mean them is such a blessing. The community I’m cultivating has been years in the making. However, I can acknowledge that community and care is an immense privilege, especially in a world that seeks to isolate us into the most efficient units that bring the most profit to large corporations. Oh, to live under late stage capitalism.
While many chalk up non-monogamy simply to dating, sex and relationships, community is the key to the sustainability of this relationship orientation.
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When you’re in a minority that directly challenges the status quo, you face social pushback and isolation. We make up for that by a network past our chosen family, metamours and loved ones. Non-monogamous community helps us feel less alone, process compulsory monogamy and sustain long term connection.

​Read the rest on Patreon!​

Gabrielle Smith

Non-monogamy educator & sex/relationship writer

Read more from Gabrielle Smith

Dating shows love to microdose polyamory... but is it ethical? I'm a total slut for reality TV — ironically, it's a total escape from reality. Dating shows especially are my vibe. The messier, the trashier... the better. Especially when we see women and men subvert common tropes: men being actually more emotionally intelligent, women coming together instead of resorting to catty infighting, and, my favorite, when folks choose to leave for the sake of their mental health. The genre has always...

6 months ago • 3 min read

Hey. It's been a while, hasn't it? The last eight months have been transformative, but in the smallest ways and largest ways. They’ve snowballed into a million things. It’s almost ironic that it’s been slightly bookended by the suspension of my main account @bygabriellesmith. That’s right. If you haven’t noticed (and I wouldn’t be surprised if you didn’t, because I've been shadowbanned!) my main account has been suspended by Instagram. The charge? “Human exploitation”. This just speaks to...

almost 2 years ago • 2 min read

Read this if you wonder why Black folks need safe spaces—even at play parties. cw: racism In the small space of time between the turning of the leaves and the surge of the Omicron variant, I managed to attend a sex party. I went with my anchor partner, Alex, which made the experience feel like we’d come full-circle. The first time we had attended this specific party, we had been together for about three weeks. I’d been back in New York for about two months, and I was still living with my...

almost 3 years ago • 6 min read